An Appendix and a Clogged Drain

Written by Joel, sent out on our church prayer chain today:

"First off, my brother in law Mark is out of the hospital, appendix taken out successfully, and is at home resting now.  Continue to lift him up that he will be back to 100 percent ASAP.

"Second, Dave encouraged us this past Sunday to pray for the [church] body every time we saw a prayer request come through. This is a small thing, but in a huge way I credit everyone's intercession as the reason. This morning Jean told me that our tub drain was all clogged and not draining. This is not a big deal at all, just meant I would need to stop by and get some Drano on my way home from work tonight. I was at work for about 5 minutes when our maintenance guy looked through a tunnel window at the carwash and said, "What is that doing in there?" I walked over and saw a really weird plastic device stuck up high above one of the dividers in our carwash. He said, "That is a special tool for unclogging drains, go get rid of it." To me, I was staring at God's provision for our drain, not a huge deal really, but I knew immediately that God was answering everyone's prayers for my brother in law as well! If you need an appendix out, God will provide skilled hands; if you need a drain unclogged, He has you covered too."

"And my God shall supply all your need according to His riches in glory by Christ Jesus." -- Phil. 4:19

Best Cruise Ever

You might read about our vacation and think, "Weirdos."

Who takes their parents on vacation? Who has a good marriage *and* parents with good marriages? Who has two sets of parents who enjoy being in the company of each other?

We do!

Our first cruise celebrated our 10th anniversary in 2011. We loved the experience, the friends we made, the places we went, everything! When we went on a second cruise in 2012, we knew we wanted to bring our parents with us. We discussed it with them, making sure that those prone to motion-sickness were on board. (Pun intended.) Everyone wanted to go and we began to make plans. Things fell into place when we found out that we didn't owe taxes this year, which freed up one of the quarterly bonuses that Joel receives from work. We did the math, and announced to our parents that we were taking them on an all-expenses-paid trip to Mexico. We told them we love them, we appreciate all they've done for us over the years, and we've had so much fun cruising that we wanted to share it with them also. Along the lines of 'what do you buy for the person who has everything', we figured that our siblings already have them covered for grandchildren, so we'd get them a cruise.

Last week, the wait was finally over. We left after church on Sunday, which was also Mom's birthday. Our first stop was Cracker Barrel, where Joel advised everyone to start 'stretching out their stomachs'. We enjoyed the ride south, adding new states for some of our parents.

I had gotten a really cheap rate for our first night's stay at Days Inn in McComb, MS. But when we attempted to check in, around midnight, they had lost our paid reservation, and the printed out email with a confirmation number stumped the apathetic front desk person. No apology was offered, and although rooms were available, it seemed too difficult for her to rent them to us. After far too long of standing in the smoke-infested lobby, we got back in the rented mini-van. On the same exit, we tried Comfort Inn, with a locked front door and no one to buzz us in, and Howard Johnson, with a nice lobby, but no attendant. Feeling like we were in Bethlehem during a census, we drove on down the road until we hit Louisiana. Turns out that God wanted us to stay at the ah-may-zing Holiday Inn Express in Amite City. At 1:00am, we stepped up to the door, and the most friendly hotel representative I've ever met buzzed us into the lobby. Debra was wonderfully cheerful and accommodating. She gave us all three rooms at the veteran rate that Dad requested, which was almost $50 less than the advertised rate on the internet. We all slept wonderfully, in beautiful rooms!

Monday afternoon, after a scenic drive around the streets of New Orleans that we've so often seen on episodes of "Cops" and after a trip to Wal-mart, we boarded the Carnival Elation. We saw our rooms on the Empress deck (107, 111, 117). We ate at the buffet. We walked around the ship. We sat on the deck as the ship departed down the Mississippi River. When our suitcases were delivered to our rooms, we wondered why it was taking them so long to deliver our garment bags. Joel came back to the room for nap time, and I mentioned that our garment bag and Dad's garment bag hadn't been delivered yet. He realized right away that we had never taken them out of the Dodge Grand Caravan's 'stow-and-go' beneath the seats. The garment bags weren't missing, they were in the rental van, in the parking garage. When I saw Dad, he had also realized where they were. We had each been worried about each other, but it turned out that everyone had plenty of clothes for dinner, but it'd be on the casual side, since no one could 'suit up'. We had a private table for dinners in the Inspiration Dining Room, so everyone enjoyed being casual, and Joel didn't wear a tie on elegant night.

On our first cruise, we found it difficult to know if we were walking towards the front or back of the ship, and got turned around several times. I shouldn't have been surprised when Dad was instantly oriented to the ship, knowing where everything was, and which way to take. Navy knowledge of port and starboard must be easily translated from destroyers to cruise ships. 

Tuesday morning, our first Sea Day, my parents were camped out on the starboard side of the ship, which was shady as we sailed south. They had secured the perfect location for our morning relaxation: shade, breeze, near food, overlooking the water. We all sat there for the first half of the day, admiring the royal blue water and enjoying the cool breeze.

Lobster Night was a hit. Our waiter, Edwin "Eddie" from the Philippines, was fantastic. Absolutely fantastic. We enjoyed his serving at dinner and his talented dance moves. On the much anticipated Lobster Night, Joel and I felt like parents taking their children to Disneyland, in that we don't care to eat lobster, but we're happy to see others enjoying it. Dad, Mom, and JB all got lobster tails. Dad skipped the starters, so he could save room for lobster, and ordered two plates, which also came with shrimp and mashed potatoes. Eddie offered to bring more lobster before anyone could ask for additional helpings. I think that JB and Mom each managed two lobster tails. Dad set a new personal record by eating three lobster tails in one sitting. He couldn't even finish his shrimp on the final plate. When Patrick heard the story, he had assumed that it had been over the course of a week that Dad had eaten three lobsters, and was surprised when I clarified that, no, it was in one sitting! It was no surprise that JB tried everything weird and unusual, which he claimed wasn't that weird and unusual, but his choices were listed under the "didja ever..." section of the menu, and included things like frog legs that still looked like frog legs, sushi, alligator bites, escargot (Joel says, "escar-nasty"), and more. JB said, "If you always try everything, you never know what will be your next favorite food." My favorite food is Warm Chocolate Melting Cake. Everyone thought I was exaggerating when I said I was going to get it every night, but I proved them wrong! We all laughed about Anne's cold soups, which were each brought with a very small portion of flavorful something in the middle of a bowl, and then the waiter would return with the soup to pour around the asparagus, or strawberry, whatever it was. It was especially funny on the first night, when some of us ordered two starters, and she was presented with a large bowl, with barely one bite of food on it, and Eddie didn't return for some minutes, leaving us all wondering about the tiny portion.

Wednesday was our first stop: Progreso, Mexico. We got off the ship, rode the bus in from the five-mile-long pier, and booked our excursion to a private beach through Auto Progreso. (While waiting to depart, no one would pose with an iguana on their shoulder, no matter how much I begged.) Our tour guide, Marianna, made the 25-minute bus ride seem short, by telling us about the area and the history of the Yucatan Peninsula. I found it most interesting that "Yucatan" means "I don't know", because when the Spaniards asked the Mayans what the name of their land was, the Mayans didn't understand their question, and answered, "I don't know." The private beach was so much more enjoyable than the public beach that Joel and I had visited the year before, where people were selling things up and down the beach the entire day. The private beach was clean and pretty and relaxing. The water was shallow for a long ways out. Our only complaint was the music that was playing when we arrived. It wasn't our style of music, which we might have overlooked, except that it was very R-rated. Apparently, if Spanish is your first language, English curse words and explicit language aren't offensive. Joel complained (after I complained, with no results) and they changed it to Spanish. The lyrics may have been just as bad, but now the fluency was reversed, and I was the one who wouldn't know the difference. Later, a Mariachi band came, and walked around singing "Happy Birthday" for people. We'll never know if they could play or sing anything else, because they only did many rounds of "Happy Birthday". Anne and Joel got massages on the beach (only $40 for two people, supposed to be 30 minutes, but lasted an hour). The excursion was all-inclusive, with food and drinks. We enjoyed sodas, but people riding back on our same bus had enjoyed lots of alcohol, which made for an annoying bus ride back to the ship. Marianna was amazing, joining the party of drunks in the back of the bus and somehow calming them down.

Thursday was our second stop: Cozumel, Mexico. We went to Joel and my favorite place, Chankanaab State Park, where the Caribbean Sea gets deep right away, super salty, and has more fish than JB and Joel can see in one day. They barely came out of the water all day, enjoying the fish and taking photos and videos with JB's new underwater camera. I had brought JB contact lenses to wear for the day, and it was the first time he'd been able to see underwater! He and Joel could have stayed there for a week and not been satisfied that they'd seen enough fish... we were only there about five hours. Mom liked the water, but wearing a life jacket makes you bob more with the waves, so swimming in the Caribbean Sea gave her more motion sickness than being on the ship. 

We had only one night on board that was rocky. We could feel the ship swaying at dinner. The weather was windy and we were sailing at 42 knots, rather than an easy-going 12-15. After dinner, both JB and Mom were feeling queasy, and we all decided not to go see the magician or the comedy show, but instead go to bed early. JB, Mom, and Dad all ended up wearing wrist bands for motion sickness and taking Dramamine, but everyone fared well overall, with no puking, thank God.

Usually, on our returning Sea Day, Joel and I feel let down, disappointed that our cruise is already over, and wondering how soon we can do it again. This time, we woke up on Friday, feeling like the week was finally complete. We were able to pack enough enjoyment and relaxing into our 5-day cruise. Our dream of taking our parents was a reality at last! We spent our last day lazily eating more food, playing cards near where the food is served (Shanghai, and I won), taking final naps, and seeing the comedian who told a joke that JB had already told us the day before. Even the drive home seemed to go quicker with good company. 

Our final hurrah was Saturday night dinner at Lambert's restaurant (home of the throwed rolls), in Miner, Missouri. We had memorized the exit number as we drove south, and talked about stopping on the way home. Even though everyone had followed Joel's advice thoroughly, arriving at Lambert's with our stomachs ready, we still weren't able to finish our dinners there. They threw rolls, they walked by dishing out fried potatoes, fried okra, beans, macaroni and tomatoes, apple butter for the throwed rolls, and cracking jokes along the aisles. Anne drank a bucket of tea. The food was delicious and the staff was entertaining and we only wished that we lived closer to a Lambert's and that it wasn't signaling the end of our trip. 

Though I can't tell it the same, Mom and Dad said that JB ended the trip perfectly with just the right joke, told as we drove down our street... that he went on a business trip, and was getting ready for the evening. He put on his tie, and heard a voice say, "Nice tie." He looked around and didn't see anyone, but was kinda creeped out. Next, he was combing his hair, and heard, "Nice haircut." Now he was getting really creeped out. Finally, as he was putting on his jacket, he heard, "Nice suit." It was too much, and he called down to the front desk, and told them everything. They assured him that everything was fine, and that was just the complimentary mint on his pillow.

Even though Anne insisted upon thanking us at every turn (she can't help it, she even hugged me and thanked me in the Cracker Barrel bathroom), we have even more to be thankful for. We are so blessed to have such great parents, who we count as our closest friends, who get along with each other, who went on this adventure with us, who we love so much. 

It was the best week ever.

Summer Olympic Goals

Joel and I watched the 2008 Olympics as avid Phelps Phans, cheering on the Americans in swimming and gymnastics, but paying relatively little attention to the running track, except for Usain Bolt. We both had good jobs, but did not derive much satisfaction from them. We were sending a hefty monthly check to our credit consolidation company. And while everyone else on the planet was pregnant, we had not yet shared our adoption plans with our families. 

We vowed that when the next Summer Olympics came around, in the very distant future of 2012, we would either be parents or debt free. Both these aspirations seemed highly unlikely, but we set the goal nonetheless. How would we save money for adoption while dealing with our massive debt? I wish I had noted the dollar amount we owed in July 2008, a mere four years after we had begun accumulating it. I estimate we owed somewhere in the neighborhood of $20,000. During this time, I had added up all the interest we paid on everything (including our house), and found that three out of four weeks, I went to work to pay interest. And why did paying off debt even matter if we had no toddlers with whom to share our lives?

The very distance future of the Summer Olympics 2012 dawns on a different couple. Same people, but much changed over the past four years. We are still Phelps Phans, but enjoy watching Ryan Lochte just as much. Gymnastics will always be our favorite Olympic event, transforming us into pros, who can expertly critic holds and landings and vaults. Usain Bolt is only one of many runners, all of whom have times and feats that wow us even more, in light of our healthier lives. Joel now runs several times a week, entering many races, and hopes to be part of the top ten for the Labor Day Run. I suggested a stair climb in March, a 5k on the morning of July 4th, and go to the gym regularly. My clothing tags don't list my dream numbers. The scale doesn't reflect my hard work. I've quit Weight Watchers. But I eat healthier in order to feel better. I surprise myself with the strength I've gained since the beginning of the year. And I'm not out of breath when I climb three flights of stairs. 

Our jobs have morphed. Joel went from Manager to Senior Manager to General Manager, running Waterway's Westport location as of this past April. I changed jobs twice in the last year, leaving Overland Optical just before becoming a certified optician (that's right, I can add "ABOC" after my name). I spent six months at a poorly run company, owned by an uncaring doctor, and managed by a petty control-freak. Now I come home stress-free and enjoy a well-rounded job of helping people choose eyeglasses, running tests for the doctor, tagging frames, submitting insurance, compiling paperwork, and discussing People magazine with my two coworkers. The three of us make up the "Sappington" division of Eye Care Associates of St. Louis.

Joel has a large base of computer customers. I'm convinced that some of them ask him to come over for the smallest things, just so they can spend time chatting with him. I have the privilege of leading the children's ministry at church. I'm so blessed to hear them recite their memory verses from the previous week. Joel leads worship once a month, and fills in teaching as necessary. I do important things like make copies of the church bulletin. Occasionally, our garage might catch on fire, or an exciting hail storm come total both our cars. But unless AAA is cutting us a check that week, our lives are happily ever routine.

If everyone on the planet is still pregnant, I wouldn't be able to tell you. I don't notice, unless they are producing another lovely niece or nephew for me to love. In a few weeks, we are celebrating our 11th Anniversary by visiting the 11th person who will call us aunt and uncle. We will be aunt and uncle to 12 people by next year, continuing the tradition of having a niece or nephew every calendar year since 2004. (Christmas 2013 will prove whether or not they are "cheaper by the dozen".) Two years ago, I read a book about living childfree (versus the rather negative outlook of "childless"), which included the beautiful line, "All children deserve a childfree aunt or uncle." I love doing special things with our nieces and nephews. I love talking to them, seeing their accomplishments, and spending time with them! We still have vague plans to adopt... someday. We have not started any processes, filled out any papers, or made any decisions. We have a clean slate before us, and though we are fairly sure that adoption is in our future, we don't know the timing or the plans that the Lord has for us. We're enjoying our happy marriage and family of two, including the occasional fight over who will turn off the light at bedtime. We did, however, cave in and get a plant. It's an adopted plant from my work, and we've kept it alive since December. Now whenever anyone follows the question "Do you have any children?" with "Do you have any pets?", we are able to proudly tell them that we have a plant, therefore putting to rest their fears that we are villainously uncaring or grossly incapable of taking care of a living thing. We have a living plant and we remember to water it. We also go to the movies on the spur of the moment (when we're lucky enough to find a plant-sitter), take quiet road trips (animated cartoons keep our plant quiet in the backseat), and rely on alarm clocks to wake us up (so that we can go water the plant). Yes, we know what we're missing out on. Our timeline is different than the stereotypical American family, but our lives are just as meaningful.

On August 4, 2001, when we stepped down off the stage of Calvary Chapel, as husband and wife, the song lyrics that played were, "I don't know what the future holds. It ain't clear where we go from here. One thing is true, God is in control. He is the keeper of my soul." The Lord doesn't give us movie-trailer type previews of coming years. We trust Him and He leads us and directs us to the path of His choosing. He has chosen such a perfect path for us, better than any we would have chosen for ourselves. We look forward to seeing where we go from here. It could be missions work. It could be parenting. It could be continuing to be a witness at our jobs. It could be full- or part-time ministry. It could be joining a circus as rodeo clowns. It's not up to us. It's up to Him. But there's nothing holding us back...

... because other than our car and our house, we are debt free. I set up the final payments through our online banking. Guess which day they go through to our creditors? July 27, 2012...

... the first day of the 2012 Summer Olympics.

 

Healthy Living

Joel and I will both turn 30 this year. Seems time to get our act together. We have a plan in place to pay off all of our debt (except our house) by the end of this year. Getting to a good financial place is much like getting to a good physical place... you gotta cut back, choose wisely, and pay for past mistakes.

We joined Weight Watchers the beginning of February. When I say "we", I mean that we both went to a meeting together, to hear the introduction. Joel has continued to follow the plan on his own, while I have continued going to the meeting. Several people from church had been talking about Weight Watchers. I've done it years ago with my family, so I know it's the tried-and-true thing that works. But what really made my decision is seeing someone I hadn't seen in two years, who had since lost 80 lbs with Weight Watchers. I was aware that she changed her lifestyle, but I hadn't yet seen her. When I did run into her, I was completely impressed. She looked like a different person! I asked her what her secret was, and she told me that she goes to the meetings every week, because it's a continuous recovery, like being an alcoholic. Seeing her spurred me on. I decided that I wanted to be that person who is barely recognizable to people they rarely see.

For the first time in years, we have only healthy food in the house. No chips. No candy. No cookies. Only one emergency frozen pizza.

It's so strange to hear Joel talking about "Points". And at the same time, it's so great, because when he makes dinner, he chooses healthy options, and lets me know how many Points our dinner is worth.

We are both making good choices, and working together to pay off the debt we are in to our bodies. Joel has about 10 lbs more to pay off, and I have another 50 lbs. We're on our way. It's the same strategies to paying off debt... if I 'charge' more things (McDonald's, candy bars, etc), it's just that much longer til I can dig my way out.

"Nothing tastes so good as being thin feels."

Goodbye, Home Phone

My first home phone was in California, where I was born, and lived my first three years.

My second home phone was 428-0988. The first one that I memorized when I was a kid. I was three. Not only that, but I had to also memorize the 314 area code, in the event that I was kidnapped to another state. When we moved to a new house, my mom had them keep the same number, because I had already memorized it. For a few years, we answered our phone, "Hosanna Calvary Chapel", because it served as the church phone number.

My parents changed their number and the church number at the same time, in order to split the calls up properly. I was twelve when I memorized a second ten-digit number, my third home phone number, which is my parents number still.

My fourth number was probably the most exciting. Dad got a second line! Patrick and I had our own number! 314-428-4225. Okay, let's be realistic. I had my own number, which Patrick was allowed to use, and I had to be continuously reminded that it was his too. I was sixteen. We had just gotten the internet, which also shared the second line, and charged us by the minute. I also had to be continuously reminded to log offline when writing my lengthy emails to friends that I already saw twice a week. When we first got that number, we thought it was so hilarious, because we got lots of calls from the previous owner of the number: McDonald's. The number got further upgraded when Uncle Steve gave us his old answering machine. It had a full size cassette tape in it, and we could make catchy messages to our hearts' delight. My favorite phone was a clear plastic phone, with lights that flashed when it rang. The only thing that made it better was the day that Dad brought me home an unexpected present: a fifty-foot phone cord!! Now I could walk around the whole basement while on the phone!

Home phone number five was in Indianapolis. 317-823-0134? Joel and my first married number. I was twenty. Local phone only, and we continued to utilize calling cards for our many long distances calls to Missouri. We even had a phone on either side of our bed,... in our one room living space. One cordless (which died before the end of many long distance calls), so we also had the backup with a long cord. There were times Joel went to bed earlier, and I dragged the phone cord into the bathroom and sat there talking to my parents in Missouri or Lera in California.

I was twenty-one when I got my sixth home phone, as we moved to our condo in Maryland Heights. 314-739-9475. I always liked trying to find out if a phone number spelled something cool. Patrick and Tanya had a number that was ???-DOG-T, which rocked. Our condo number spelled SEX-WISK. Yeah, we didn't really publicize that.

October of 2005, we moved into our house. I was twenty-four. Home phone, number seven: 314-423-9066. It had a zero, which means you can't spell anything, but it was all ours. Part of our identity. It's what I spout off at checkout lines. It's what I fill into the blank right after "Address". It's who I am. It's stability. It's tradition. It's part of me.

Seven home phone numbers. Seven, the number of completion. Never would I have guessed that I'd turn thirty without having a home phone number. I won't be coming home to that little flashing red number, which denotes a call from an immediate family member, a telemarketer, a bill collector (in times past), or the occasional church friend. I will never again wonder, "Who did I get a message from?". Now my smarty-pants cell phone will tell me who called before I hear the message, taking away all the fun of the surprise. I would be upset that my kids will never memorize their home phone number, or be concerned that they will have to memorize two, both mine and Joel's. But c'mon, they will just program them into their own cell phones as soon as they blow out the two candles on their birthday cake.

One day, I will tell my grandchildren, as I recently told my nephew David, that people used to only be able to make calls from their home. David asked me, completely puzzled, "WHY could they only call from their HOME??", already knowing, at age five, the extreme inconvenience of this. But when I tell my grandchildren, perhaps they'll ask, "People had phones attached to their homes?". Then they'll look it up on the holographic version of wiki-future-pedia.

Goodbye, home phone. You are gone from the dresser top, but will not be forgotten in the cardboard box in the basement.

"Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending."

Blog. It's been on my to do list. I have a half-finished, never-published draft of our second vacation last year, during which we went to Washington D.C. and Ocean City, MD. It's one of those perpetual back-burner things that I put off until an entire year has slipped by without me noticing it. Now, instead of looking back and seeing all the little nuances of the year that warranted a blog, the year seems like a big jumbled heap of days, all mushed together.

I feel as though much of life is a cookie cutter duplicate to last year. We work at the same companies. We live in the same place. We follow the same schedules. We eat the same food. We watch the same TV shows.
But there are significant differences from last year.

In October, I began overseeing the Children's Ministry at church. It wasn't the amount of work that it could have been, but it certainly wasn't as easy as I had perceived. It took a full six months until I felt comfortable in my new church role. It was very clear to me that God had given me the responsibility not for the good of the church or the good of the children, but for my own personal good. He always provides exactly what we need.

December was a difficult month for both Joel and myself. I purchased a three-foot fake Christmas tree from Wal-mart, which felt like a devastating compromise. It wasn't a happy option, but we decided it was a reasonable middle ground between two depressing choices: having a real tree or having no tree at all. I still enjoyed the annual Christmas tree hunt with my family and took pictures of the three trophy trees that were headed towards houses. Our little fake tree fit our home perfectly.

Our Christmas plans got changed at the last minute due to snow storms across Missouri. We had planned to spend Christmas morning in Belton. Back in 2002, we drove through a snow storm to Belton for Christmas. On that trip, it took us two hours to drive Lake St. Louis, what would normally have been a 30-minute drive. My dad had begged us not to drive that year, and we drove anyways, and know now that it was a dangerous decision. We decided to learn from our mistakes and be responsible adults and change our plans. So we stayed in St. Louis on Christmas morning, and drove to Belton the following day.

In January, we regained control of our finances. We were already far removed from using credit cards, but were in a continuous cycle of falling behind on bills, causing late fees, which caused more bills to go unpaid. We finally jumped the hurdle of paying everything on time, and promptly set up a realistic budget. The first few months of following this budget were completely eye opening. Rather than buying whatever we wanted, and hoping there was enough money left for the bills, we were paying all of our bills first. (This approach seems so simple when we actually got around to trying it.) For the first few months, when I paid bills, I racked my brain to think of what I forgot to pay. I had to be missing some bills if there was money left over. When it occurred to me that this money (however little or much it was) could be used to pay extra on bills, it was quite liberating. We added up our debts and found that if we stick to our budget, we will be completely out of debt by January 2012. It may sound a long ways off, but it's the first time we've had an end date, which is completely exciting. When we arrive there, we will turn the page into the next chapter of our lives, debt-free and pursuing adoption.

In April, Joel's job changed. He moved from managing at the Westport Waterway, to heading up the new Waterway Detail Center. He and his boss traveled to Denver for a week to learn about detailing from their Denver counterparts. It was an extremely busy month, loaded with information, and packed with hours. Joel worked up to 70 hours a week during April, getting the Detail Center up and going. He's still working hard on marketing, but not so many hours. The last few weeks have been filled with calls to hundreds of customers, with thousands left to call. He is calling every Waterway Car Club Member, a time consuming task which is not Joel's favorite. Joel would go crazy if he had a desk job, thankfully Waterway keeps things interesting for him.

April was busy for me also: birthdays galore, housesitting, women's retreat, trips to Belton, organizing the Children's Ministry teacher schedule to allow for several weekends out of town. Through some varied circumstances, I learned a lot during April. I had the unpleasant experience of being very emotionally hurt by someone's opinions expressed to me. I believe that they intended to be motivating or encouraging, but that was not the result. God showed me that it didn't matter how uncaring and naive people are, I do not have to defend myself. God is my defender, and He doesn't need people to approve His plans. I also learned that I have become much stronger than I would have guessed. Such a situation would have devastated me in the past, but I was able to cast those cares on the Lord, and refocus on navigating through the valleys of life. I shouldn't have been surprised, because valleys are vulnerable to attacks. The stronger I am, the higher I can hold my shield of faith to fend off attacks. On the opposite side of the spectrum, some words spoken to me at the women's retreat continue to resonate encouragement in my life and remind me that the Lord knows what I'm going through.

In current events, I am changing positions at work, leaving the front desk, and moving out onto the floor. Tomorrow, I start training for "pretester" (optometric technician, the person who does the puff test on your eyes before you see the eye doctor). Once conquered, I will continue on to train for optician. I'd like to think that I'm slightly ahead of the game, due to learning by immersion, but I'm surely going to be surprised by the amount of information I have yet to master. I have an equal mix of excitement and nervousness.

The best new thing is that Joel and I have joined our nation, in that our new pastime is baseball. We have been to three St. Louis Cardinals games. At the second game, we both set a new record for how many games we'd been to in one season. We are going to our fourth game next week. We had even talked about spontaneously going to the game tonight, but Joel had a quick work commitment that prevented us from it. We are even subscribing to mlb.com, so that we can watch Major League Baseball games from our computer (Joel has it streaming to our TV in the living room). We know the players names, we look up any rules we're unfamiliar with, we cheer from the stadium and our living room. In short, we have become fans.

We are loving our Sundays together. It had been a long time since we had a consistent day off together. Now we ride to church in one car. We go out to lunch. We go swimming. And we watch baseball. Life is good.

Michigan Vacation

"A vacation is having nothing to do and all day to do it in."

Michigan Vacation, Part 1: Grand Haven

I am all about internet vacation planning. I love picking a town, finding out what's there, and checking the mileage with Google Maps. I try to stay away from the B&B sites, because it takes hours to get out of that trap. I am positive that I spent more time looking at websites for Grand Haven than the time we actually spent there.

We left on Sunday afternoon, and drove about seven hours north of St. Louis, to Grand Haven. Our hope was to get there in time for the 10:00pm performance at The World's Biggest Musical Fountain. We've been to Las Vegas, and I remember being impressed with the fountain there, so we didn't want to miss this point of interest. We got there early enough to check in at the Best Western which I had cell-phone-booked during our drive (thoroughly researched on the internet). We asked the girl working at the counter what she thought of the fountain. In the most monotone voice you can imagine, she replied, "It's the world's largest musical fountain." Aha, a local. However, turns out that she wasn't so far off... it was kind of lame. Apparently, the Grand Haven crowd is more easily impressed than the Vegas crowd. Though there were plenty of families there, we got the feeling that it was a prime spot for pre-teen dating.

So we headed back to our hotel. It was a decently big hotel, but our room was in a secondary building, around back, with a thin row of parking spots between the hotel and an old set of railroad tracks. The hotel was clearly pretty empty, and we were clearly as far from the lobby as we could get, yet the only room touching ours... yes, booked with people listening to their loud TV. After the not-so-immense excitement of the fountain, we were pretty hungry, so we went out and found an Applebee's. Mmm! When we pulled back into the parking spot in front of our room, it was closing in on midnight. Our headlights shone on our hotel room door, where there was one shiny child's handprint, which disappeared when the headlights turned off. Between that and the deserted old train tracks, I told Joel he better unlock the door super fast, lest I be entirely creeped out. Fortunately, the creepiness was soothed by many television stations.

We woke up on the early side and Joel grabbed us some hotel breakfast before we headed to the beach. According to the internet, Grand Haven has the best beach in Michigan. The picture shows the beach covered with people laying out. We had the place to ourselves on Monday morning, because it was rainy and windy. We braved the unhelpful weather and walked along the beach to the lighthouse. It was COLD!! We loved the waves, and said that if we ever got a few days off together during the summer, we should make the drive and sit by what has to be the closest beach to St. Louis that has waves.

Michigan Vacation, Part 2: Belding

Ever since I heard of the town, I've wanted to go to Belding, Michigan. Joel's aunts and some of their cousins went for the first time last year, after living all their lives just a few hours away. And JB has never been there! We felt like cheesy tourists as we drove around town, taking pictures of everything that said "Belding" on it, but how many people get to go somewhere with their last name? We sent postcards to friends and family, and wrote to the VanDalens, "Good luck finding a town with your last name".

Belding is now a small town, with a friendly atmosphere, and people who are genuinely interested in your last name and willing to tell you more than you care to know about the town. It was once the silk capitol of the world. Two Belding brothers began silk mills. Ladies would come from all around to work there and stay in boarding houses. One of the mills is now loft apartments which rent for $500/month.

When we left Grand Haven that morning, we passed a Jimmy John's, and I wanted us to stop and get sandwiches for a later lunch. Joel refused, saying he wanted to eat at something like "Mr. Belding's Restaurant". I made fun of him, saying there wasn't going to be anything like that. As we were talking to our new friends outside of Belding City Hall, they recommended that we go eat lunch across the street at "The Belding Bros. Cafe". We were so surprised! There wasn't even a sign for it, that's how small of a town it is. When we walked in, the guy working there (who's name was Pete, same as Joel's grandpa), told us it was closest compared to Panera Bread. They served soups and sandwiches and specialty coffees, but the food was amazing and the place was incredible! They have tables and couches and a pool table, and it's all Christian owned, with a verses about fellowshipping and 'doing all things decently and in order' on the menu! It was definitely on par with The Overflowing Cup in Murrieta, CA. We loved it! And Joel loved being right about eating at a restaurant named Belding. Along with the old time pictures of Belding that were on all the walls, they also had some remaining Belding silk thread on display.

Michigan Vacation, Part 3: Port Austin

Now it was time to meet up with the Belding/Vandevelde party at Aunt Beth's place. Joel's Aunt Beth and Uncle Gary own The Sun N Sand Motel across the street from Lake Huron. It's really comfortable and relaxing there.

We arrived there the day before Beth's birthday. Months ago, I had mentioned to Joel that we should get her a gift for letting us stay there, and that he should keep his eye open for anything unusual. His Aunt Beth has the best sense of humor, and nothing less than a unique gift would do. I found the perfect gift when I was in Kimmswick on my birthday. I was in an antique store, and the second I saw this, I knew I had to get it for Aunt Beth. It's a bronze paperweight, in the shape of a banana, that says "Top Banana" on it. Does it get more random? After opening it, and laughing lots, Beth said, "It puts a _______ on my face!"

Beth and Gary had us over for dinner a couple times. One night, Beth served us the most delicious blueberry pie imaginable. It was so tasty! However, little Stephanie was interested in her own version of tasty. We were all sitting around chatting one evening, and Melanie and Stephanie were playing nicely around their house, with Melanie showing off all the seashells she had "picked" at the beach, when we noticed that Stephanie was crunching on something. There were plenty of snacks around, so we couldn't be for sure, but the only thing within her reach was the paper bowl of seashells sitting in front of her!!

Melanie adored the beach! She was in her element, finding tiny collectible things. When they had stayed at our house on their way to Michigan, Melanie had shown me her plastic cassette tape case she had brought with her, that was full of roly poly bugs. At first glance, I thought they were dead ones, because just previous to this, she had shown me her plastic baggie full of cicada exoskeletons that she had been collecting off trees. But when I said something about them being dead, she shook the case and showed me that no, they were indeed crawling around. I told her, "Please DO NOT OPEN that in my house." Becky hadn't known she brought them, and they made her dump them out outside. She is the ultimate outdoors girl, certainly inherited from her grandpa. JB and Joel took her out to the beach everyday to look for shells. Aunt Beth walks the beach every morning, looking for treasures, and comes up with some amazing finds!

JB and Joel went out fishing with JB's friend Tom, who he's known since grade school. Melanie was very upset that they were going without her, but we did fun girl things, like shopping and eating out. Becky and I joked that Anne was our tour guide, since she's been to Port Austin so many times with JB, and found things to do while he was out fishing. She knew all the best places to go, but Becky was our source for directions. We looked up our directions on "Beckyquest". Tom took the guys out on his boat a couple days and they also fished at a river. They caught some big fish, but only kept them for photo shoots.

We went to go see Joel's Grandpa Pete most mornings. He lives in a nursing home because his knees are so bad that he can't put weight on them anymore. It was interesting to visit him, because although he has all his mental capacity, he is currently staying in the pysch ward. Apparently, his previous roommate was annoying him so much that he requested to be moved, and that was the only place they had for him. After seeing his current roommate, I was surprised that it was a change for the better, because this one mumbles to himself and motions to no one saying, "I'm going to kill you!" One afternoon, we all went outside to enjoy the beautiful weather in the courtyard. (While St. Louis was having the first heat wave of 90 degrees, we were bringing our jackets with us for the 60 degree weather there.) Melanie enjoyed sneaking a live worm into her pocket, to be found later all nasty and squished. All the nurses there love Joel's grandpa! He jokes around with them, and pretends to shoot them. One nurse is such a great guy, he came and talked to us for awhile, and recounted how he and Pete skipped out on the Christmas party that Pete didn't want to go to, and instead he took him driving around to look for deer. And another nurse was getting married in a few weeks, and wanted Pete to be there, so this same guy was going to come pick him up and take him. When the nurses were getting him settled after coming back inside, one was putting a pillow under his head and asked him to pick his 'head up', to which he replied, "Don't you tell me to shut up!", even though he understood perfectly.

Saturday morning, we got up and went to the Port Austin Farmer's Market. I expected fruits and veggies, which they apparently do have later in the season. I wasn't expecting an awesome flea market! They had everything from baked goods to souvenirs to garage sale items to $1 cinnamon rolls (Joel went back for seconds). One vendor had a tree with sunglasses on it. Little Stephanie went up to these flamingo glasses, kissed them and put them back. The man gave them to her. Moments later, someone tried to buy some, and he told them they were only for sale as part of this decorated tree.

Saturday night was the reason for the trip: Joel's cousin Abby's graduation party. Beth and Gary put on a massive party for her, with a taco bar and homemade creme puffs. Abby had wanted a party with a taco bar ever since grade school, and finally got one. The ladies who catered it made every possible Mexican food. There were the basic taco fixings, then sizzling fajitas, a Mexican soup, salsa and guacamole, plus fruit kabobs and SO many desserts. Did I mention the homemade creme puffs? It was amazing! JB was in his family element, catching up with everyone and talking to old friends. Abby the graduate (also referred to by Anne as "Beth's son Teresa") is third from the left in this family picture.

It was a very relaxing vacation! We had a great time hanging out with JB, Anne, Becky, and the nieces. We love Michigan!! Some of Abby's relatives on the other side (who were also staying at The Sun N Sand Motel, of course) said, "See you when she gets married!"